Legally and Eternally Ours

Tuesday morning we all went to family court to have Nathan declared a Turek.  He has currently been "Baby Doe" according to the legal system.  We waited and waited which was proving to be very difficult for Joshua.  He never misbehaved but just kept saying this is taking a really long time.  He actually fell asleep in PopPop's lap during the hearing.  (This is highly unusual for Joshua.  He only sleeps in his bed.  However, since he "slept" in our bed for about two and a half hours the previous night it was also not that surprising.)  Our attorney had informed us the day before that we actually testified at this proceeding.  I have never been to a court room and really only anticipated sitting quietly and smiling and nodding as appropriate.  He also informed me that I would speak first and then he would just call Matt up to basically affirm what I had said.  WHAT?!  I don't want to talk.  Okay, so you all are saying, "Vanessa, not talk...yeah right."  Okay, I agree I would probably have gotten in trouble if Matt were the sole provider of the story because I would want to interject.  I am really bad about that.  Our time arrived and I was called to the stand.  I was able to answer basic questions but then I was given the opportunity to share briefly about our adoption story on our side and in regards to our beautiful birth mother and family.  I was also asked to share about the day Nathan was born and the way I feel about him.  Obviously, I have loved him from the beginning and I love and respect his birth family but having the opportunity to put it succinctly in a court room just reaffirmed and strengthened those feelings.  It was a wonderful experience.  Matt then was called to the stand, and he verified all that I said to be true.  He was then asked to describe our marriage.  He gave length of marriage, a few facts, including that I take care of our boys, feed him dinner, make him lunch (at which the bailiff began chuckling.)  He said, "everything is 50/50, okay 90/10" and everyone chuckled.  Matt has a great way at bringing laughter to any situation.  The judge then expressed how much he had enjoyed this hearing.  He declared Nathan to be Nathan James Turek from this day forward.  Matt and I held hands and just felt a huge sense of relief.  Joshua was woken up, and we rushed to the front to take a quick picture with the judge.  The court gave Joshua a bear to commemorate the day that his brother officially was adopted.  He named him Wally????  (3 year olds)

It was home to eat lunch, have the boys nap, and then drive to Columbia for the icing on the cake of the day.  We were going to take Nathan to be sealed to our family forever.   When people are married, the preacher says until death do you part; we believe that marriage is eternal and should be forever.  We are married, or sealed, in temples and believe that this way after this life we will still be husband and wife.  Any children that we have are automatically sealed to us, but children that come in another way, like adoption, can be sealed to your family as they come.  Matthew 16:19 reads, " And I will give unto thee the keys of the kingdom of heaven: and whatsoever thou shalt bind on earth shall be bound in heaven: and whatsoever thou shalt loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven. 

The simple ceremony is very special and done inside a beautiful and peaceful room.  We were all dressed in white which is how we dress inside of the temple.   Our parents, one set of Matt's grandparents, and some of our friends attended the ceremony.  Joshua was quiet and really appreciated that he was inside of a special place.  Nathan cried during the first part but Matt was able to rock him for a few moments and he was asleep.  The person performing the ceremony says a special blessing that basically says that all the blessings and promises that would be to a child born to you are the same to this child.  At that moment, the pain that I have felt and sometimes still feel over infertility seemed erased.  The sadness that I have felt sometimes over the fact that I didn't carry Nathan for 9 months and the worry over Nathan's feelings about adoption in the future seemed minuscule.  He is ours and we are his.  We will take each day as it comes but the temple blessings are real and the sweet feelings we all experienced there will be remembered by all of us.

A couple, Jeff and Cindy, basically an adopted set of parents for us, set up tables at a church building close by.  Matt's mom picked up sandwiches, chips, and fruit.  Another sweet friend, Dora brought dessert and helped us set up and clean up.  We were all able to eat and visit about our special day.  Dora also gave Joshua a wooden block with the Columbia temple on it with the words families are forever. Joshua opened it in the car on the way home.  He was excited and instantly began reflecting on the day and the significance.  

It was truly a wonderful day for our family as Nathan officially became ours legally and eternally.  We are blessed beyond belief.